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I really need some HOPE :(
Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 2:34 am
by Ashley2486
I am having a pretty bad day and feeling really down. I haven't gotten a diagnoses yet, but I am pretty sure I have something going on with my pudednal nerve. I had a miscarriage in Jan and had to have a D&C. A month after that I fell outside. I don't really know which one caused my symptoms to be honest. I'm not sure if a d&c could cause something like this but at this point anything seems possible to me. Or maybe it's the fact that I gained 10lbs after the miscarriage and hit the gym harder than I have in the last few years. I was just starting to get back into running. Or could it be from my job where I sit for approximately 37.50 hours a week...the worst part about this is I can't even mourn the loss of my baby because I have been busy for months trying to figure out what is wrong with me and now that I think I might know, I've been too busy mourning the fact that I might never fell the same again. I might never be able to pee normally or have a normal bowel movement... Or even have enjoyable sex for that matter. And I will say I was really enjoying sex those few months we tried to get pregnant.
![Sad :(](./images/smilies/icon_e_sad.gif)
im so sad because I'm only 30 years old. We were going to have babies and have a family and right now I feel like all of that is so far out of reach. This is really ruining my life. I am having a hard time working because I can't sit for too long. It's just gotten worse this week. I worry I irritated the nerve further. But what am I supposed to do? I can't not work my job. Today I tried doing as many task standing up as I could. I am scheduled to see a physical therapist next Thursday for an evaluation. I am just hoping so much that she can help me. I am trying to hang on to the smallest bit of hope that I can right now and it's getting hard. It's getting really really hard. I could use some hope right now. Has anyone had any good experienced with PT? I feel like reading on here people haven't. Has anyone had a baby after dealing with this horrible depressing disorder??? I just want to have a baby someday. Obviously not any time soon, but I need to know it can happen someday.
![Sad :(](./images/smilies/icon_e_sad.gif)
Re: I really need some HOPE :(
Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 3:31 am
by janetm2
Ashley,
I amso aorry to hear of your loss and subsequent issues. Not sure what or if the combination of things has attributed to the possible nerve problem or just compounded it. Certainly you are having some stress and maybe the mindbody process could help. I am hoping the PT can help or at least help diagnose something, they were the ones to point me in the right direction. I have seen others write about having children even with this condition, there is hope. Taking standing breaks is a good idea, I actually printing more things to force me to get up and get them off the printer and got up every 20 -45 minutes depending on the day. I allso tried to focus on getting a diagnosis and treatment to keep hope. Wising you well.
Janet
Re: I really need some HOPE :(
Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 5:56 pm
by Ashley2486
Janet,
Thank you so much for your response. You have given me some hope. I am feeling a little better today. I do believe whatever is going on is a mild case, but I had gotten a little worse over time. I am hoping I can find a way to manage it and still live my life. I don't want to give in to this. So I am trying really hard to be stronger than this. People like you on this site really help because you give us something to relate to and a sense that we are not alone in this when everyone else around us can't seem to understand what we are going through. It's such a hard thing and that barrier makes it even harder. Thank you again! I will keep you posted.
Ashley
Re: I really need some HOPE :(
Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 8:40 pm
by solarmom
Hi Ashley,
I am so sorry for your loss and that you have this pain on top of that.
Hang in there until you see the physical therapist. I have been seeing a pelvic therapist off and on for a year and a half and have improved, with less pain after bm, no pain with urination, and better sitting tolerance. Although in reality I think most of my improvement came from the external work( my pain started after lifting). If you fell some of this could come from muscle issues and it sounds like you've been exercising a lot.
Warm showers after bm and icing my butt and sacrum at the end of the day have been my friends!
And sleep.
I will also say that with the miscarriage and surgery you may want to see someone to help you work thru that.
Or find a miscarriage support group .
Re: I really need some HOPE :(
Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 10:52 pm
by April
Ashley,
I'm so sorry for your loss and all the difficulties you've been through. Like Janet, I have read entries from women who had children after developing pn, so that is definitely a possibility. Here are a few thoughts on your situation: You may want to get a specialized cushion for your seat at work. There are several long threads on cushions. You can put put "cushion" on the search box above to find them. And, as solarmom said, icing is great. On my bad days, I ice all day long (I work at home a lot), and I go to bed with an ice bag in my underwear. You may also be able to get a lidocaine prescription to help numb the nerves when you can't use ice. The other thing that may be helpful to know is that this problem tends to fluctuates a lot, and most of the time I have no idea why it's getting better or worse. So, for me, over a year into this, when I enter a flare, I know that I will at some point come out of it. Knowing that helps a bit. The other thing I'll mention is that you may want to avoid intense workouts at the gym. Swimming is the only exercise I do now, and I even avoid steps and inclines if possible. Keep us posted.
April
Re: I really need some HOPE :(
Posted: Sun May 29, 2016 12:03 am
by Ashley2486
Thank you all for the responses. I am feeling better today. I do believe I may have a tight pelvic floor muscles. I can feel the pain in my right butt cheek and it's not only when I'm sitting. It's some times when I stand too or even when I lay down. I am really hoping it's just right muscles and hoping PT will help with it. Thanks for all the suggestions!!
![Smile :)](./images/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif)
I will try some of these. Has anyone tried Aleve for the pain?